Friday, February 18, 2011

It's been a while.

This is Anders mom.

I just found the login information to this blog that I lost over a year ago. So now Anders can start blogging again.

To kick it back off I thought I'd post some of the stuff that has come out of Anders mouth the past while ... some I may have written down before, some are brand new.

On chess:
Do you know what knights are called when they are midgets? Pawns.

On the class system:

Anders says moron.
Me: Do you even know what moron means?
Anders: Ya, it means you're not cool. Like you're lame.
(OK, didn't know he knew either of those words.)

and

I thought _____ was a total dork because he has a cranky voice and he smells. But he's totally not, he got a medal and a trophy.

On monsters:
Maddie why do you always fall for stuff? Monsters don't even exist. They just tell you that so you'll go to sleep.

On El Nino:
(While watching a documentary about El Nino causing the South American fishermen to not catch any fish.)
What's the big deal, why don't they just go to the store and buy some?
Like, they thought this was such a big deal they made a movie about it, and I came up with that whole store thing in like two seconds. (Don't worry we did have a little chat about where that fish in the store comes from ... those fishermen.)

On acronyms:
Mom what does A.S.P.A. spell?
Do you mean A.S.A.P?
Ya.
It's a shorter version of as soon as possible. Its an acronym, it's like a code so you don't have so say the whole thing.
Ah, like PB & J?

On the food chain: (Overheard while he was playing Legos with a friend.)
Did you know that bug food is called prey?
I didn't know that.
I didn't know that either but it says that in my bug book.

On pop culture:
Have you ever heard of the movie diarrhea is a wimpy kid?

On perspective:
We're at the pond and see a small pumpkin sitting on a lily-pad.
Maybe that lily-pad dressed up like a pumpkin for Halloween and forgot to take its costume off.

On body odor:
Something smells like beef jerky. If that's me then I want to eat myself.

On geography:
(To a random kid on the playground in another town.)
What kind of school are you going to be in?
No response.
USA?
The USA one?

On brainstorming how to buy a motor home:
I know we can use those hundreds of thousands of coins in your room.

On personal hygiene:
His response to me bugging him about wiping better.
Mom, the truth is I don't really care to wipe. I don't like it when the toilet paper breaks and I get poop on my fingers.

On slang:
He hears a teenager on TV say "Let's party" like "Let's Pah-ty!"
All confused he says: That's weird, I think he's talking about the potty that comes out of your penis.

On role-models:
Dad and Grandpa are like the bird crew. Maybe I'll be able to join them someday.